I just had a conversation with a new work friend (Ryan) who talked about running a program for people curious about having their own business.

"An accelerator," my cofounder of Startup Women NC said, the third participant in this conversation.

"No, an actuator, not an accelerator."

As leaders, it can feel like we're running little accelerators all the time. We're teaching, clearing hurdles, managing chaos. Or a lot of chaos. We function as managers to move forward those who are on our team, just like an accelerator exists to move forward businesses trying to grow.

But this was a big shift in language, and in that moment, I decided I'd rather be an actuator.

An actuator helps another see the reality of where they are or want to be.

It can be positive—affirmations and cheerleading, escorting someone to an incredible destination. It can be mirror-like—reflecting back what conversations sound like to an outsider, offering a kind or challenging interpretation. An actuator can also be strengthening—showing a better way to do something while still getting things done.

Sadly, actuators don't get a good rap in most businesses. They're seen as Debbie downers or not team players. Businesses say they want people who will challenge, think outside the box, be big risk-and-reward types... but all within bounds, very carefully, without making anyone uncomfortable.

But that's the nature of growth—being comfortable with being uncomfortable. And getting comfortable with the uncomfortable is the responsibility of each of us.

This is why I believe in creating novel experiences for teams—new challenges, experiments, creative projects. Novelty helps us practice being uncomfortable within the context of joy and choice. When teams get comfortable with discomfort through novelty, actuators become valuable instead of threatening.

I don't mind being an accelerator, but I'd rather be an actuator any day.